We can’t afford it.
That is a line I heard a LOT in my house growing up.
Whether it was true, or not, that was the mindset. We lived our life in a feast or famine money cycle.
Money was good and things were good! The food was better, parents where happier, and somehow we always ended up with a new couch lol.
When money was bad, there was a lot of fighting, stress, and yelling.
Like most blue collar jobs, my dad’s income was seasonal. It was just part of life that things would come and go. Bonuses were great, but they didn’t happen every year.
In the busy times both my parents would start work before the sun came up, and finish when it was dark. They worked so freaking hard.
It was their chance to get ahead. One more chance.
It never worked out though, and it wasn’t because the money didn’t come, it was because the mentality was, we couldn’t afford it.
If you deeply believe you cannot have something, you will constantly attract, and create, situations, people, circumstances, etc, that reinforce your beliefs.
You will get rid of the money as soon as it arrives, and you’ll swear you don’t know what happened.
At 35 years old, and 39 weeks pregnant, I’m ready to change the cycle, and those same beliefs, that I have carried into my adult life.
The beliefs that create a mass of wealth in my life, over and over again, just to have me find a way to get rid of it again.
The only way to change the results, is to change the behaviors, and the only way to change the behaviors, is to change the beliefs!
I am extremely clear on what I want for my life, for my daughter, and for our family. I am also very aware that it is going to be a lot of work, growth, and discomfort to achieve.
It is my absolute commitment that Snow and I will be 100% debt free by the time our daughter starts kindergarten.
This includes all past IRS debt, student loans, any extra credit cards, business expenses, both cars, you name it. EVERYTHING GONE.
I have a real plan in place FINALLY for Snow and I to make this happen.
I will not tell my daughter we cannot afford it. She will NEVER hear that from me.
I have no intention of spoiling her mind you, or creating some sort of naïveté around money and hard work, but she will also not hear “can’t” out of my mouth.
If there is a sport she wants to play, we can afford it.
If there is an art she loves, we can afford it.
If we want to keep her in a certain neighborhood, we can afford it.
If there is a cross country field trip, we can afford it, and hell I’ll come with.
If there is a private school that is better suited for her, we can afford it.
If there is a college she wants to go to, we can afford it.
If there is a business venture she wants to explore, we can afford it.
If she gets the chance to study abroad, we can afford it.
For all the things I don’t even know that kids want yet, we can afford it.
Our daughter will be born this month, heck probably this week lol, and that gives me 5 years, to undo my old beliefs, create new behaviors, and have different results.
This will take some ego checking, saying no when I really want to say yes, being honest with our friends, telling my husband no (that’s the hardest one for me), and some serious grown up discipline.
I have spent to many years scared to fail at this, and this time, the fear is not louder than my desire to change. I know I CAN do this, it really has only been a matter of if I WILL.
This is my next growth journey.
My hashtags for this journey will be #debtfreefordestiny #debtfreeby2023 #financiallyfreeby40
The books I have read, and recommend, about this are: