I Will Never Tell My Daughter We Can’t Afford It.

I will never tell my daughter that we can’t afford it.

That sentence alone carries a lot of weight for me.

Growing up, “we can’t afford it” was said often in my house. Sometimes it was true. Sometimes it was fear. Sometimes it was habit. But no matter the reason, it shaped how I saw money, safety, and possibility.

There were seasons when money was flowing and life felt easier. There were also long stretches of stress, tension, and constant worry. I watched how money stress changed the mood in a room. I watched it change people. I learned early on that money came and went, and that security could disappear at any moment.

That belief followed me into adulthood.

I carried it into my relationships, my career, and my decisions. Even when money came in, I lived with the fear that it would disappear just as fast. I spent years operating from a place of scarcity, even when things were objectively okay.

Now here I am, about to become a mother, and something in me has shifted completely.

I refuse to pass that belief down.

That does not mean I will raise a child who thinks money is unlimited or that effort doesn’t matter. It means I will raise a child who understands that money is a tool, not a source of fear. That abundance is created, not stumbled into. That choices matter, and so does mindset.

I will not tell my daughter we can’t afford something because of panic or fear.
I will teach her how we afford things.
I will show her how to plan, save, work, prioritize, and create options.

If she wants to try a sport, we will find a way.
If she wants to explore art or music, we will find a way.
If she dreams of travel, education, or experiences, we will find a way.

Not because money magically appears, but because we choose intention over fear.

I am rewriting the story I was given.
I am breaking a pattern that has lived in my family for generations.
I am choosing growth, responsibility, and possibility over limitation.

This does not mean perfection.
This does not mean life will be easy.
It means I am committed to doing the internal work required to create a different outcome.

I am willing to be uncomfortable.
I am willing to learn.
I am willing to change my habits and beliefs.

And most of all, I am willing to show my daughter that she does not have to shrink her dreams to fit her circumstances.

We will build a life where “we can’t afford it” is replaced with
“How can we make this work?”

That is the legacy I choose.

The books I have read, and recommend, about this are:

Change Anything – Kerry Patterson and Joseph Grenny 
Total Money Makeover – Dave Ramsey
Total Money Makeover Workbook – Dave Ramsey 
The Law of Divine Compensation: On Work, Money, and Miracles – Marianne Williamson 
MONEY Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom – Toby Robbins